Losing Baby Teeth

Should I be offended that my boys don’t tell me when they have loose teeth? To me, that is like saying I’m not qualified to change a diaper or they can’t stand the taste of my breast milk. Since when do kids get to tell their parents what is in their job description? I had always thought that being a tooth-puller-outer was just one of many perks of motherhood. No discussions.

Boy, was I wrong!

My Love Affair with Teeth Pulling

When I was a kid, I loved the thrill of loose teeth. The pain and blood involved made me feel tough, and I loved the shot of adrenaline that came with ripping off a part of my own body. Okay, so that sounds a bit dramatic. It is also a bit untrue. My mom was the one who mostly ripped those suckers out. I remember the feeling of her nails against my little gums. Though it sounds somewhat nightmare-ish now, I loved staring down the face of danger, so why didn’t my kids feel the same way? Wasn’t I selling it enough?

Though it may seem twisted to get excited over something like pulling teeth, I have to admit that the thought of pulling out my kids’ teeth seemed like my glorious right of passage as their mother. The memories came rushing back when I learned of big brother’s first loose tooth, and I was ready to take my place as the rightful tooth-puller-outer.

That was until they took that away from me.

It is hard to blame them. I am a bit intimidating. Ask anyone. I just thought a little bit of that intensity would rub off on at least one of them. I had to have produced a little warrior like myself, right? Apparently not!

Instead, my boys only told me about the loose teeth in the very beginning, but this changed over the years when they decided that it was just easier keeping it a secret. They didn’t even tell their dad in case he let it slip around me. I don’t think I’m scary. I’m just someone who is ready to be in their corner, like any other great mom would be. Again, this is a prime example of me setting too high of expectations on things that I don’t really have control over. Any parent can tell you that we can plan all we want for things, but when it comes to our children, there is no guarantee how things will turn out.

The fear of telling me about their loose teeth set off a downward spiral into many disappointing “tooth episodes”. Too dramatic again?

Tooth Episode #1

It all started when big brother came home one day from second grade only to say that the tooth that was loose for days, one in which he didn’t want me to pull out, had indeed fallen out on the playground after someone bumped into him and knocked him down. I felt like I missed the last shot in the final seconds of the game. I was getting so excited for that tooth. It had been so loose that I had anticipated it would come out that day or the next. I feared that he would eat it, since it was SO loose, but I was hopeful for the best.

Instead, the tooth was lost. Never to be seen again. My son, of course, didn’t seem too upset about losing it. Evidently, the money he got for the previous tooth wasn’t enough to make him feel at a loss for this tooth. He didn’t need money anyway, or so he declared that night at the dinner table. Either that or the fact that he didn’t have to worry about mom pulling it. Geez, thanks!

I thought, “screw that! I need that tooth!”

I know that this shouldn’t have anything to do with me, but to clarify, I’m a recorder of sorts. Both boys have baby books that are filled to capacity and then some. Heck! I’m still adding to them, though they are only meant for the first 5 years and my kids are now 9 and 7; I don’t see myself stopping anytime soon. I can imagine a little note being added for the first chest hair or day their voices start to crack. I like to record it all, so you can imagine how upset I was when big brother came home without the tooth. I had half the mind to go out there with a flashlight to look, but I knew it was a fool’s dream. That tooth was gone. There was one empty space in my little tooth holder keepsake thingy that would never been filled. (Massive sigh!)

I decided to take a breath and get over it. After all, it was just one tooth, right? I could still continue to record my children’s lives to the fullest of my ability without it, right? There was still work that needed to be done.

That’s one thing about raising kids that I was learning over the course of 9 years of being a mother. There are no “sure” things.

Fast forward a year later, big brother comes home from school one day as if it was a normal day. Nothing to report.

Then, for some reason, out of the blue, he makes some sort of comment about it being weird to eat because of the hole in his mouth.

Umm…excuse me? What hole?

This is when I started to noticed that they weren’t telling me when their teeth would start to get loose. I was completely surprised by this.

“Did you lose a tooth today?”, I asked him in my calmest and most caring of mom voices, cautious not to let my true feelings show.

“Yeah, it came out during one of my recesses, but I’m not really sure when,” says big brother as if he were talking about something as insignificant as the weather.

“What do you mean, you aren’t sure? How can you not be sure when a tooth comes out?” I asked, just as confused as ever.

“Well,” he began, “I remember eating my fruit, and I think it was still there.”

I had one of those quiet moments when words could not be found. How could a 9-year-old boy eat apples for his fruit break and somehow “misplace” a back tooth? Not a front tooth, but a back tooth!! I was dumbfounded.

I decided that it was fine that he couldn’t remember when it came out, since that wouldn’t really change anything. I thought it was just best not to question him anymore. As long as I got to see the tooth and add it to my collection (insert hand shuffle here), I would be fine. This was his first back tooth to come out, and I was very curious, and let’s be honest, excited to see it. I was as giddy as a kid in a candy store.

That was until he continue to speak.

“I don’t know what happened to it.”

I, again, found myself faced with another dumbfounded and shocked-to-silence type of moment. I could only stare at him. This was the be all and end all of “mic drops”. He seriously had no idea where it was.

This is not an acceptable answer in my opinion. Did he swallow it? Did it fall out? What?

He said that it either came out during fruit or shortly thereafter during recess. He had no idea, nor did he know what happened to it once it came out.

I couldn’t believe it. How is it that he pays so little attention to things that he misplaced an entire tooth? I had to have a look at the hole. Maybe, it was really in there. At this point, anything was possible.

What I found shocked me more than ever before. Apparently, it was not just the one tooth that he lost, but also the cap from the next tooth, in which he had gotten when he was super little, was also missing. Swallowing a baby tooth or spitting it out without noticing could be logical, but to swallow a back tooth and the cap of another tooth without knowing it seemed to be pretty unlikely.

Unlikely or not, it was reality. I debated on taking him to the hospital, since the cap was metal and it freaked me out to think that it was cutting up his stomach. I thought, perhaps, I should pay attention to the toilet after bathroom visits to look for signs, but luckily, I wasn’t that crazy.

We took him to the dentist the next day, but the dentist didn’t seem too concerned. This caused me to relax a bit, which, of course, brought my attention back to the fact that I was now down another tooth for big brother.

Come on!!!

If this little episode proves anything, it is that my kid is not a worrier. A bit clueless at times, yes, but we already knew that. He still sticks to the story that it wasn’t loose to begin with and that he didn’t know what happened, but I’m not convinced.

Still, I have to look past it.

Tooth Episode #2

That is, of course, until little brother reveals one night at dinner that he can’t eat because he is afraid his tooth will fall out. No matter the amount of encouragement I can give to him, he still is not interested in pulling (or having it pulled) out his tooth. I have to respect his wishes, but you better believe that I’m watching him. I’m not going to have another big-brother episode. I’m going to have a full collection of this guy’s teeth. Mark my word!

The next morning, he comes into our bedroom very early and says that he is starving but can’t eat because he is afraid the tooth will come out. His big argument is that he doesn’t want it to bleed. I get him to show me how loose it is, and it is as loose as it possibly can be. I managed to give him a small suggestion as to how to get it out. All he has to do is get his fingernail in between the tooth and the gums and slightly, ever so gently push down. He does, it comes out, and we are back in business!!

There was also NO BLOOD. What is with kids these days?! The little bit of blood is the exciting part, right?

We have a better track record when it comes to teeth with little brother. Though, he has had one other tooth come out since then, it has been the result of the use of the suggested move that he used with the last tooth. It was also a secret that he kept from his mom. I guess I should be proud that he is actually pulling out his own teeth, no matter how loose they are, instead of them falling out and not knowing it.

Babies No More

Why should I care, right? They are just teeth! To be honest, they are the little reminders that my boys aren’t so little anymore. Losing these teeth and getting new, big-boy teeth mean that they are growing up. Holding on to their teeth lets me hold on to their childhood. No matter how gruesome and dark it might seem in retrospect, I think it just shows how I am not ready for them to grow up so fast.

I know that our teeth stories are not over yet. They still have plenty to lose, and I can imagine that the episodes that haven’t been written yet will most likely be the best to come. If I can’t be the one to pull them out, I will accept that quietly. That is, as long as big brother doesn’t eat any more. Now that I think about it, I might want to start brushing his teeth at night, just to make sure he has any left.